Why don't you let me off your website?
Posted: Thu Aug 29, 2013 8:45 pmPosted today on FB:
Rant for Today: Why to websites ask you "are you sure you want to leave this page?"
Seriously and then they go on to give you a chance to recant your decision like it was some type of confession of sin.
Dear Website Owners:
...
If you're selling something that I find questionable or do not want, I will leave your site willingly, knowingly and without your guidance. If your page just plain sucks, same premise. I do not need a "nanny net" to guide me through this E-wilderness. I promise not to get lost, talk to trees, or pick up hitch-hikers. Ok, maybe I'll talk to trees but that's another topic.
The offers of "free" stuff with ridiculous shipping costs, or worse an auto refill system is disingenuous at best, incredibly slimy and potentially illegal at the worst. These sites leave me feeling like squirrel fodder and desperately in need of a bath. Um disclaimer: no squirrels were harmed in the writing of this post.
Turn off the buttons; turn off the crappy music (you do know that there are songs with understandable lyrics and no gimmicks right?). And by god the plaid color scheme HAS TO GO. It's a statement that says: "I need help tying my shoes in the morning, let alone effective web design"
- I don't want heels so high that I get nose bleeds
- I don't want food supplements that are "natural" but I cannot even pronounce them!
- I don't care about the next perfect diet - they don't work, they're too expensive and to be honest I'm rather fond of my fat.
- A "banner" should be the name of a hidden secret superhero not something splashed like paint on a wall (if you don't know the reference you're too damn young)
- Ads - ok I get you wanting your click money (my mother would have called it pin money) BUT by god watch your placement. Take a look at this if you think that you've got it right: http://www.boredpanda.com/worst-adverti ... ent-fails/. And if I have to read more than two ads just to get to your "information" - you're gone; toast; useless; and probably still live in your mother's basement.
- Don't allow comments on your website unless you're going to monitor them (people like me watch, wait and work on witty wordsmithing just for such an occasion).
I could ramble on but anything much over 700 words doesn't get read anyway. Didn't know that? Go back to marketing 101, and let me leave your website in peace.
Rant for Today: Why to websites ask you "are you sure you want to leave this page?"
Seriously and then they go on to give you a chance to recant your decision like it was some type of confession of sin.
Dear Website Owners:
...
If you're selling something that I find questionable or do not want, I will leave your site willingly, knowingly and without your guidance. If your page just plain sucks, same premise. I do not need a "nanny net" to guide me through this E-wilderness. I promise not to get lost, talk to trees, or pick up hitch-hikers. Ok, maybe I'll talk to trees but that's another topic.
The offers of "free" stuff with ridiculous shipping costs, or worse an auto refill system is disingenuous at best, incredibly slimy and potentially illegal at the worst. These sites leave me feeling like squirrel fodder and desperately in need of a bath. Um disclaimer: no squirrels were harmed in the writing of this post.
Turn off the buttons; turn off the crappy music (you do know that there are songs with understandable lyrics and no gimmicks right?). And by god the plaid color scheme HAS TO GO. It's a statement that says: "I need help tying my shoes in the morning, let alone effective web design"
- I don't want heels so high that I get nose bleeds
- I don't want food supplements that are "natural" but I cannot even pronounce them!
- I don't care about the next perfect diet - they don't work, they're too expensive and to be honest I'm rather fond of my fat.
- A "banner" should be the name of a hidden secret superhero not something splashed like paint on a wall (if you don't know the reference you're too damn young)
- Ads - ok I get you wanting your click money (my mother would have called it pin money) BUT by god watch your placement. Take a look at this if you think that you've got it right: http://www.boredpanda.com/worst-adverti ... ent-fails/. And if I have to read more than two ads just to get to your "information" - you're gone; toast; useless; and probably still live in your mother's basement.
- Don't allow comments on your website unless you're going to monitor them (people like me watch, wait and work on witty wordsmithing just for such an occasion).
I could ramble on but anything much over 700 words doesn't get read anyway. Didn't know that? Go back to marketing 101, and let me leave your website in peace.
