XOF News

[grapes]

XOF NEWS Now You Know



An often repeated maxim (attributed to Vince Lombardi) is “Show me a good loser and I’ll show you a loser.” Thanks to current politicians, we now know it should end with “Show me a sore loser and I’ll show you a loser, who wants to fuck everything up.”

Crippled America - Donald Trump

[grapes]

XOF I Will Die On This Sword




UNVAXED STATES RAVAGED BY COVID, blame it on immigrants

CUOMOS DISGRACED, what? we’re democrats

BILLIONAIRES IN SPACE FACE BACKLASH, they should stick to their yachts and mansions

IF ANYTHING SHOULD HAPPEN TO ME, I was killed in the battle of Tollense valley

[Thumper]

XOF NEWS Now You Know



An often repeated maxim (attributed to Vince Lombardi) is “Show me a good loser and I’ll show you a loser.” Thanks to current politicians, we now know it should end with “Show me a sore loser and I’ll show you a loser, who wants to fuck everything up.”

Crippled America - Donald Trump

I saw a funny post somewhere Paraphrasing:
People should take the virus seriously. I had one patient that got covid and ended up so brain damaged he literally thought he won an election he actually lost by over 7 million votes. Get vaccinated people!

[grapes]

Heh, one of the headlines on my newsfeed yesterday (it might have been Newsmax) said someone had been fired after bringing a Joe, you know I won cup to work.

[grapes]

XOFnews The Tau of Math




1. To pi or not two pi, that is the question
2. Bear your fardels with alacrity
3. Th'oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely, pffft
4. Go ham on ignorance and laziness
5. Three words: spherical harmonics
6. Ohm

[grapes]

XOFnews Bottom of the Pile



XOF has finished months of investigation, digging into the business holdings of Elon Musk, and have finally arrived at the fundamental building block of the Musk uberempire. Here it is:

X.com
https://www.x.com

[grapes]

XOF Race To the Bottom





Three geophysical researchers have attained a modern era record in scientific hypoauthorship. The trio are publishing a paper S-wave Modulation in the Outer Core in the October edition of Physics of the Earth and Planetary Interiors. That is the fewest number of authors in this hyperauthorship era, which has seen as many as over five thousand authors on a single paper. The really interesting thing about this paper is that one of the authors is a young undergraduate who some people say is working on a paper alone, but she is being very secretive about it. Who knows? We may soon see two-author papers as common, and maybe even see the appearance of single-author papers. Exciting times!

[grapes]

XOFnews The Tau of Math

6. Ohm

It is especially ironic that the mantra of submission (om) is a homophone with the mantra of resistance (ohm), surely a sign of the simplicity and unity of the universe.

I think I’ll call it the Uniterse.

[grapes]

XOF Boosterism




FDA MAY RECOMMEND NO BOOSTERS FOR USA POPULATION, anti-vaxers demand OnlyBooster option

OMITUSA (Only Made In The USA) REJECTS HAWAIIAN LEIS, not American enough

STRONG SUPPORT FOR TRUMP 2024 BID, based on two thousand Man-in-the-Street interviews

PHYSICIANS GROUP IDENTIFIES SIDE EFFECTS OF WHITE JINGOISM, loss of empathy, loss of smell, loss of rhythm, smell

[Sigma_Orionis]

XOFnews The Tau of Math

6. Ohm

It is especially ironic that the mantra of submission (om) is a homophone with the mantra of resistance (ohm), surely a sign of the simplicity and unity of the universe.

I think I’ll call it the Uniterse.

Yer going all Ying/Yang on us again huh?

[grapes]

Everything I know, I learned at unitersity.

Do unto others as you'd do into others
A penny saved is a penny urned
Nothing ventured, nothing
A bad penny always turns up tails
All for one and that one all for me
He who hesitates is consulting his gps
Lie down with dogs, wake up with me
Make your bread, now lie about it
An ounce of prevention is worth more than 28 grams of prevention
Wealth is one percent perspiration and 120 percent personal relation
Don't judge a book by its last page

[grapes]

XOF In Your F* Dreams





TRUMP ADVERTISES NEW COFFEE MIX, "I NO U-1 Joe"

ELON MUSK DECIDES TO NOT THROW GARBAGE INTO SPACE, will no longer throw money up there either

CHINA ADMITS BELT AND ROAD INITIATIVE IS COVERT INFILTRATION, Duh! we thought you knew ...

BOTH USAn POLITIAL PARTIES AGREE TO ABIDE BY THE CONSTITUTION, party platforms are in shambles

VALUE OF AMATEUR ATHLETIC ENDORSEMENT FALLS, has been reduced to a buck two eighty-nine

ON ECONOMIC NEWS, MAN IN STREET OVERLY OPTIMISTIC, woman in street says O no he won't

[grapes]

XOF Breaking News



The Internet was clogged with acronyms, bringing down Facebook and several of its clowns. No one was really sure what the SEV was, some thought it was a high severity incident, some thought it was merely a site event. Ultimately, it was pinned on BGP, border gap protocol, and incidental Haitians. Zuckerberg stammered through the press conference, promising a new commitment to AA (acronym avuncularity), which seems to be intended as a more friendly internet, not your funny uncle.

[grapes]

Clones not clowns

[grapes]

XOF Book Case


How can you go wrong with Gs in your title?

Guns, Germs, and Steel by Jared Diamond
Gob’s Grief by Chris Adrian
God Is Not Great by Christopher Hitchens
Gods of Gotham by Lyndsay Faye
Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn
Gold Boy, Emerald Girl by Yiyun Li
Girl’s Guide To Hunting & Fishing by Melissa Bank
Girl Waits With Gun by Amy Stewart
Good Good Pig by Sy Montgomery
Good Grief by Lilly Winston
The Good German by Joseph Kanon
Grim Grotto by Lemony Snicket

OK, maybe this is too much (note the lack of Oxford comma):
Genes, Girls and Gamow by James Watson

[grapes]

XOF Digging the Dirt

Nebra Sky Disc

Some colleagues found this bronze disk while looking for buried electrical copper to salvage. They turned it for a pretty penny, but the authorities were tipped to it, and they squealed. Now, it's being displayed in a German museum, and the British Museum in London has announced it will be a centerpiece of their Stonehenge exhibit in the Spring. It was originally just a cartoon of some calendar freaks showing the alignment of the fingernail moon and the Pleiades rising to the north of it. 3500 years ago, no one thought to measure altitude or azimuth. A couple decades later, yes, and that's when the problems started. Someone pointed out that the sun was on the wrong side of the moon, but everybody ignored that. They added a strip to represent the extent of the horizon where the sun sets--whcih allows the other two elements to be seen, but there was a lot of argument about how to position it relative to the fingernail moon and pleiades. Once they hashed that out, someone insisted they add one for the other side, where the sun comes up. But it was ripped off during a rock and hide tossing argument during the annual famine. That's the problem with designing stuff by committee. Anyway, eventually the solar cycle brought the northern lights and someone suggested adding *that* but the pleiades weren't to scale so it made more sense to turn the disk over, and attach the lights to the other side. You never heard such screaming. After a hundred years, they decided the whole project was ruined and they threw it in the offal pit.


https://digital.physicstoday.org/physic ... Id=1738456

[Thumper]

Hey, I did that to The Kid's room shortly after she was born. I put glow in the dark stars on the ceiling in a configuration close to what the sky looked like at 9:00pm on the evening of her birth.

[grapes]

We sleep in our daughter's old bedroom on occasion, but not often enough I guess since we always seem surprised when the stars she applied to her ceiling start appearing, after our eyes adjust.

[pumpkinpi]

In college I put a glow in the dark Moon directly over a halogen lamp. I advise not to do that. One day it fell onto the lamp and started smoking. If we weren't in the room it probably would have caused a fire. (Do they even sell halogens anymore?)

[Thumper]

We sleep in our daughter's old bedroom on occasion, but not often enough I guess since we always seem surprised when the stars she applied to her ceiling start appearing, after our eyes adjust.

That's sweet.

[Thumper]

In college I put a glow in the dark Moon directly over a halogen lamp. I advise not to do that. One day it fell onto the lamp and started smoking. If we weren't in the room it probably would have caused a fire. (Do they even sell halogens anymore?)

I used to use halogen bulbs for all my outdoor fixtures. I can't find them anymore. Been replacing with outdoor rated LED's.

[SciFiFisher]

In college I put a glow in the dark Moon directly over a halogen lamp. I advise not to do that. One day it fell onto the lamp and started smoking. If we weren't in the room it probably would have caused a fire. (Do they even sell halogens anymore?)

I have not gone looking lately but I was able to find some a year or two ago.

[Thumper]

I was up in my attic crawl space last week and found an incandescent bulb.
That was in a fixture and working!

[grapes]

XOF 2026 Titles





Ex-Presidents, starring Donald Trump, Joe Biden, and Jimmy Carter

NFTs and MLMs and IPos and the Current Recession, wtf

Elongate, how Musk turned into Mush

The NWO, translated from the Chinese

Physics or Psychics, when did science lose its mojo

[Thumper]